Recipes (Roadkill)

2 squirrels - skinned, gutted, and cut into pieces

4 large potatoes, quartered

1 pound carrots, chopped

1 green bell pepper, chopped

4 onions, sliced

2 cups water

1/4 medium head cabbage

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon ground black pepper

DIRECTIONS

1 In a slow cooker, place the squirrel meat, potatoes, carrots, green bell pepper, onions, water, cabbage, salt and ground black pepper.

2
Cover and cook on low setting for 8 hours.

Makes 6 servings

Fried Woodchuck (Groundhog)

      1    Woodchuck
      1 tb Salt
      1 c Flour
      4 tb Fat
    1/2 ts Salt
    1/4 ts Pepper

1. Skin and clean woodchuck and cut into 6 or 7 pieces

2. Put in pot, add salt and enough water to cover and parboil for 1 hour.

3. Remove meat from the broth, and drain.

4. Dredge meat in flour, salt and pepper.

5. Melt fat in heavy fry pan and saute woodchuck until nicely browned.

Serves 6

Beaver in Sour Cream

      1    Beaver, skinned and cleaned          1 ts Salt
    1/2 c Vinegar                        1/4 ts Paprika
      1 tb Salt                               1/4 c Butter
      2 qt Water                          1 md Onion, sliced
      2 ts Soda                             1/2 c Water
    1/2 c Flour                            1 c Sour cream

1. Soak beaver overnight in solution of 1/2 cup vinegar and 1 tablespoon salt in cold water to cover.

2. The next day, remove the beaver from the brine, wash and cover with     solution of 2 teaspoons soda to 2 quarts of water. Bring to a boil, reduce heat and simmer 10 minutes.

3. Drain and rinse beaver and cut into serving pieces.

4. Dredge each piece of meat thoroughly in the seasoned flour.

5. Melt butter in a heavy fry pan and brown the pieces of meat.

6. Transfer meat to a greased casserole, slice onions over top, add water and bake at 325 degrees F. until tender.

7. When meat is almost tender, add 1 cup sour cream to the casserole. Stir well and continue cooking until tender. Serves 4.

Homer's Road Kill Burgers

Two pounds of ground up store-bought COW or Roadkilled Cow, "The one I hit on the way home from the Nuclear Power Plant last week will do."

"Let's see now, 8 hamburger buns from the store, wait a minute, Marge what did you do with the buns Bart didn't eat from his Summer Camp lunches."

"In the freezer Homer!" Great now I got to thaw 'em out.

"Ketchup, let me see, Lisa go get me the ketchup packages out from under the seat in my car."

"Got to have cheese and onions. Pickles, too. Need the cheese and onions from the store and I am out of pickles, AARRGGHH."

Wait a minute what is this fuzzy little green thing in the fridge. It looks like, a moldy cucumber, that'll work. :-)

"Wait a minute I don't have a Weber Grill to cook them on my old one wore out. Absolutely have to buy a new one."

Off to the store. Bought my new Weber Grill from the Hardware Store.

2 lbs ground cow or roadkill cow
Limberger cheese
Green onions

"Let's Fire up that Grill!"

BOOM
Boom
Boom!!!!!

"Too much gasoline..."

Note: Do not use 1 gallon of gas to light the grill.

Slap the burgers on the grill.

Instantly cooked.

Buns, ketchup, cheese, onions.

"I am going to call this... Homer's Homeless Burgers."

Just burnt down my house... (sigh)

Maybe I will win a new grill for the new house I have to build.

Signed,
Homer Simpson Esq.

Dr. Bob's World Famous Road-Kill Chili

Ingredients:

4 lbs. fresh road-kill         		1 tsp. black pepper
                           1 can Sprite or 7-UP			1-3 tsps. oregano
                           2 Jalapeno peppers (chopped)		1 tbsp. cumin powder
                           2-4 tbsps. chili powder			1 tbsp. salt
                           4 cloves crushed garlic			1 16 oz. can tomato sauce
                           1 tbsp. finely chopped green onions		2 tbsps. chopped bell pepper

Dr. Bob's World Famous Road-Kill Chili

(This is REAL Chili - - So, No... There Ain't No Beans !)